The Canes have reduced me to voodoo

First they knock my beloved Devils out. Now they are giving my Timmy's Bruins a hard time. I swear if I hear LaRose one more time...I'll lose it. If I hear "What a save by Ward" one more time, I'm going postal.

So I've turned to the dark side...voodoo! Actually it's office voodoo. I'm at work and can only use things found at my desk. So no candles, chicken feet, blood, cigars, etc. Fortunately I have the voodoo doll my friend Shauna brought me from New Orleans. It's technically real. It has the power of New Orleans. Maybe it will work!


First up is Wardo. I put pins in his eyes so he can't see the puck.

For Ruutu, I put pins in his left arm. He shoots left and this will stop him.

The old gray mare ain't what he used to be, for Brind'amour, I put pins in his old ass hips.

I put pins in the head of Coach Maurice so he couldn't think well and won't be able to coach.

Jokinen gets pins in his legs so he can't make those #*!(*ing fast last minute shots.

And LaRose, my fucking nemeses. I'm so sick of hearing his name, he seems to be all over the place and in the right place. I've turned him upside down so he will be confused and out of place. he has pins in his head so he can't think well.

Staal...you bastard! He has pins in his wrist to stop those wicked shots.

And for the final ritual I took everyone on the team's name and pinned it to the doll. I then covered it with the Bruins banner so the Bruins can smother the Canes and win this series.

Go Bruins!!!